Tomorrow Is Global Orgasm Day

Tomorrow (12/22) is not merely the winter solstice, it is Global Orgasm Day. What? Yes, that's right. You are obliged to have as many "O's" as you can muster. You ladies capable of multiple O's need to make the most of it. I don't know if the goal is quantity or quality, but if it's quantity, I have not been able to exceed 3 O's in a 24 hour period since I was in my 20's, so I'll probably be hurting the average.



Now, I don't know this young woman but she can't carry the load for all of us (and as an aside- Wow! I think I love her. Where can I get that condition?), so make an extra effort to get close to your favorite fuck buddy, or rub a few out for world peace. As a suggestion, you may want to go "commando" tomorrow, just to make access more convenient. Take condoms and wet-naps everywhere you go, you know- just in case. And if you are an American, take this as an occasion to let your hair down/lower your standards/ignore your puritanical fear of sex/ignore your hang-ups and have some sex. It can only help.

So stock up on KY, paper towels, condoms, and rope, trim up your stuff if that makes you more comfortable, wash your taint, mount handlebars on the headboard, put the featherduster in the cordless drill, and remember that good guys "finish last". Be nice to one another and remember- it's for a good cause, so let's see some "O faces" out there.