Monday, February 25, 2008

Brain Slop

Things that mess me up:

Chest of Drawers v. Chester Drawers (and what if I only fill it with socks, not my "drawers"?)

Velcro (I always want to say "velcrove")

By and Large v. By enlarge

Freckles v. Moles

Waxing v. Waning

Ebb v. Flow

Flotsam v. Jetsam

The number of people I know online who have felt the need to scrap it all and start over under new identities. (I didn't say "tities"). I can kind of identify, as two folks I used to work with now know of my blog, although I don't suppose either would rat me out if I went on some kind of a tear about my employer. Beyond that I may have some family members who have found their way here, and I look upon that two ways- one, they weren't explicitly invited here. I don't mean that they are unwelcome, but they need to realize that I vent here. And two, I'm not the person that writes the Christmas cards and letters. I cuss like an injured sailor with Tourette's. I'm also a Category 5 pervert. Seriously. No, I'm not teasing. Really, really vile things interrupt my thoughts all the time. There are things in my noodle I don't tell even Schmoopie, just so she'll still come to bed with me, and she seems to appreciate filth- or my shock value anyway.

Incidentally, if you yourself were in to tying up your lover, and then one day you saw your child tying up his or her stuffed animals in his or her room during playtime, would you interpret that to be confirmation of a genetic marker or proclivity towards bondage? Just wondering...

Plus, today I'm wearing a shirt with a little embroidered logo dealy close to my left nipple (and fuck Tommy Hilfiger). I see it regularly out of the corner of my eye and try to brush it off. While at first, it was just a harmless bit of self titillation (heh- I almost said titties again), now it's leading to a rubbed raw moob kind of thing.


Wednesday, February 20, 2008

Maybe I Should Visit The Ivory Coast..

baby got back! (click me)

Have a look at this... Bobaraba!


Monday, February 18, 2008

Education Rant

I've blogged before about the Prussian method of schooling and Woodrow Fucking Wilson and the other plutocratic oligarchs that set about beating the seeds of intellect out of our youth in an institutional and systemic manner. I'm not going to recap all of that, but I was drawn to the subject again this week when I read this article.

It's been chapping my ass for more than a little while, how we embrace idiocy. Larry the Cable Guy, American Gladiators, Are You Smarter Than A Fifth Grader? (5th?) I've ranted about that too. I trudge on, surely being seen as an elitist because I have mastered subject / verb agreements. Perhaps I'm even thought to be... French! Zut Alors! And have you seen the statistics about reading? I mean, as in the numbers of grown people (as a percentage) who did not read a fucking book last year? Not one. Zero. Yeah. Holy fuck!

I also remember when I first went to college (a Jesuit university of some renown that would probably not want any affiliation with a godless heathen such as me) it was HARD WORK. You know- like with studying and making an effort and shit? That was in the mid-80's. I went back to school, admittedly at a puppy mill of higher education, and was not required to be awake. I know I didn't get that much smarter- the bar has been lowered.

We're taking our pathetic behavior all the way to the cradle now. Baby Einstein videos. [As an aside, Orwell would REALLY be enjoying our "newspeak"- Peacekeeper missiles, Clean Air Act, etc.] Kids don't want knowledge or even drugs these days- they want a goddamned Xbox or PlayStation.

This quote from the linked article caught my eye: "Sure, parents may see their "vibrant and active children gazing silently, mouths agape, at the screen." But these zombie-like characteristics "are not signs of mental atrophy. They're signs of focus." Assuming that bullshit spin has even a shred of merit, what good is focus if you are totally in the fucking dark?

For the benefit of those among us who went to public school, I'll mention a parallel. Almost 100 years ago now, there was a revolution in Russia. The Bolsheviks, distrustful of anyone affiliated with the Czar, and not especially enlightened, slaughtered or sent to gulags all the "elites". Anyone who spoke French was removed, as well as academics (although this may be a matched set, as there were few academic treatises written first in Russian). The result? An effective 'dark ages', wherein many or most of the scientific advances seen in Russia were imported from allies, or after the start of the cold war, stolen from enemies. Also worth noting- as many as 40 million people died under the tenure of Stalin. He made Hitler look like an amateur.

I'm thinking more and more about emigrating. I'm unaware of any empire (and let's not kid ourselves- the US is an empire where it really counts- in economics) that was able to reverse a decline once begun. I don't hold out much hope for this place, and I want a good life for my family. Maybe even something radical like Habeas Corpus, or freedom of assembly.

Conspiracy Theories I Believe

Not all of the damage inflicted on the World Trade Center Plaza was caused by the planes.
It was known in advance by some of our intelligence community, business leaders, and some of our allies.
Whatever happened at the Pentagon, wasn't what was reported.

Whenever someone makes, or appears to make actual progress in advancing the standards of this nation, they are killed. MLK, Lincoln, Evers, RFK. As for JFK, I believe he was killed not by the mob, the Cubans, or the Military- I believe he was killed by the interested of the Federal Reserve Bank. I also don't think Oswald worked alone.

That the dollar will become a Weimar Deutchmark or Italian Lira type of fiat money, and that this will happen deliberately because it's the only way our debts can ever be paid.
That the market is being artificially buoyed until after the election.
That the World Bank exists to keep undeveloped nations from developing.

(Separate rant/post forthcoming)

Global warming is real, and is past the point we can stop it.
Diamonds are not forever- plastic is.
That GM corn will kill off all natural varieties.
That eating kosher food wherever possible is smart, because food companies are fucked in their collective heads. Where is Upton Sinclair when we need him?

High Fructose Corn Syrup is seriously bad shit, and leads to all sorts of diseases.
Autism/Apsbergers is a direct result of Mercury/Thymerisol poisoning.
The military does unsanctioned and undisclosed medical testing on its members.

Nikola Tesla
Had a greater understanding of electricity and energy than we have to date.

There is no longer a distinguishing difference between the political parties. The rhetoric of speech, sure. The observable actions? No.
The Turks DID commit the Armenian Genocide, and should apologize.
There is an effort to hide the fact that the Irish were the second most traded slaves in the 1800's.
That Saddam Hussein was attacked and killed for moving his oil trading to the Euro currency.
That votes don't count. Period.
That the still unsolved (military strains of) anthrax mailings strategically targeted those who were or could oppose the PATRIOT ACT. Leahy and Daschle were the only two Congresspersons to be sent any, and they were the only two who could stop the vote.
That we have fucked with Venezuela (and much of Central America) consistently for decades.
Chernobyl ended the cold war- not Reagan.

That all organized religions, that insist on tithing and proselytization are cults.
That the Catholics helped the Nazi's.
That the Rastas are right- that a white racist patriarchy they call "Babylon" oppresses black people. I call them "corporatists" but why split hairs?
That the Jews are NOT out to rule the world, but they may control Hollywood.

That people are becoming more sexually active at an earlier age due to hormones in food. Dicks are getting bigger and asses fatter, which is a good thing in a vacuum, but at what price are these being acquired? Heart attacks at 30? Diabetes epidemic? Anxiety, stress, attention, and mental disorders are all rising.
That some astronauts have done sex experiments in space.

They are ALL taking performance enhancing drugs. So what? I began to believe this years ago when Tim Browning broke his arm by simply throwing a ball. Yeah. The muscles of his arm snapped the bone in his arm. Nature doesn't do that. Let big pharma companies underwrite and sponsor the Olympics for all I care.

That Google is in cahoots with the spy community.
That IBM helped the Nazi's too.
That every call you make, by any means, is electronically monitored. Same for your emails.
That the ocean floor cables in the Mid-East that were cut in the past few weeks are no accident.
That the head of Qwest, the only telco that didn't illegally give private data to this administration, is in jail as punishment.

The industry consolidation was done for control purposes, and that the industry is subsidized so that even the poorest people can get their brainwashing.
That the "Smoking Man" in the X Files was the best part of that show.

TWA 800
Was shot down, probably by accident.

USS Liberty
Was attacked by Israel deliberately.

Conspiracies I don't care much about:

Princess Di
Black Helicopter / Men in Black stuff
Waco / Branch Davidians
Loch Ness Monster
Ruby Ridge
Cars that run on water
The Moon landing


Tuesday, February 12, 2008

Do You Know Me?

Most people think I'm a Liberal, but I:

* Didn't vote on the telcom immunity bill or support its fillibuster (forgives telco's for illegally wiretapping)
* Didn't vote on the Energy Act of 2007 (requiring better fuel economy and more renewable fuels)
* Didn't vote on the Bankruptcy Reform Bill (that makes it nearly impossible to get out of debt)
* Didn't vote on Bridge Repair Funding (what more needs to happen here?)
* Voted for the PATRIOT ACT (a tirade all by itself)
* Voted for the No Child Left Behind Act (and now claims to be against it)
* Voted for the Homeland Security Act (insert color-coded punch line here)
* Voted for Real ID (hey- civil rights, who needs them?)
* Voted against Lobbyist Transparency (what's it to you, nosey rosey?)
* Repeatedly voted to authorize and support these idiotic and harmful military actions.
* Belong to the Democratic Leadership Conference (look into it if you don't know)
* Belong to the Council on Foreign Relations (insert your own theories)
* Have a looming fundraising scandal, and my finance director was convicted.
* Have some secret understanding with Rupert Murdoch
* Was on the Wal*Mart Board of Directors (while they were earning a class action suit regarding gender discrimination)
* May be using electronic voter fraud (4.5% "bump" in NH towns using Diebold systems, versus paper ballots)
* Wrote that awful 'It Takes A Village' book
* Am inexplicably still married to the guy who signed NAFTA and the DCMA into law...

Really, I'm just power hungry and will say anything in order to achieve my ends. I'm also thankful that as a nation, we can't remember anything, and don't notice much in the first place. That makes it easy for me to play the emotional card, and shed some crocodile tears at strategic times in order to appeal to your emotions rather than your reason. See you in November... dumbasses.

[sources: Vote-Smart, ACLU]

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Friday, February 08, 2008

I'm Known To Be A Pervert

And that's why my friends send me things like this:

I'm thinking all this chair needs is an attachment on the top side of the seating area- something in the middle of the seat that pokes up a number of inches, and is maybe textured, or capable of vibrating- you know, to keep the little ladies from slipping of or something.... Safety first.


Wednesday, February 06, 2008

Weird Giant Condom Thingy...

Looking out my office window, I see (among other things) the Washington Athletic Club building. The past few days, there has been a window open with a huge condom looking thing that flaps in the breeze. I took this picture with my camera phone, so I know it's not that easy to spot, so I circled it.

I'm feeling a little intimidated.

Oh, for the geeky types- in the upper left corner there is a spot (a helicopter or bird or something), and directly underneath that is the corporate headquarters for The building used to be a hospital or something, and it sits on a big hill south of the downtown area. For the super-geeks, it looks just like the clip are building that they used to show on Cisco manuals. Okay, geek time is over.