Friday, April 25, 2008

Things I've Learned About Food


Butter is better than margarine.

Smoked Gouda is better than both unsmoked Gouda and Edam.

Shredded Parmesan is better than grated and Romano sucks.

Provelone is better than Mozarella in most cases.

Cheez-Its are better than Cheese Nips

Grape is the least appealing jelly.

Marmalade is kinda gross.

So is braunsweiger.

And I don't care how much better it is for you- tuna packed in water is too dry.

What am I missing?

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9 Comments:

Blogger Mrs. Chili said...

Mayonnaise is food; Miracle Whip is an abomination.

Also, something about the cardboardiness of whole grain wheat bread (though I'm kind of fond of a good, hearty white).

I didn't know the mozzarella/provolone thing. I'm enamored of fresh mozzarella, myself.

6:45 PM  
Blogger Hammer said...

Salad dressings loaded with corn syrup suck compared to regular oil and vinegar.

6:55 PM  
Blogger Cheesy said...

I am better than both smoked gouda AND butter!

6:53 AM  
Blogger General Catz said...

Unpasteurized English Stilton tastes better than pasteurized but is against the law to buy it.

The best way to eat tuna is as sashimi or sushi.

BBQing anything makes it taste better, and that includes veggies.

Skim milk tastes like shit.

Imported yellow cheddar is better than the orange crap made in America.

8:50 AM  
Blogger Andy said...

All flavor is contained in either fats or carcinogens

10:34 AM  
Blogger Vulgar Wizard said...

Fruity Pebble suck ass as soon as the milk hits them.

8:50 PM  
Blogger Gordo said...

Romano's awesome. The rest of the family call it "Dad's stinky cheese", but I like it. :-)

Raw milk tastes better than anything. There's nothing like having to shake the butter fat back into your milk before drinking it. It's illegal, too. :-(

2:27 PM  
Blogger Mona Buonanotte said...

Stinky cheese tastes best.

Capn' Crunch...dry, outta the box...is the best thing to eat when you're drunk. However, the next morning, you won't remember what exactly tore the hell out of your mouth.

3:57 AM  
Anonymous Daisy said...

So you are over the Hydrox thing?

10:10 AM  

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